Ahh, the fruits of of study. It's pretty neat reading books and finding something new. That happens alot with the Bible. It also happened on my retreat with Foster's book.
A couple things popped out of my Celebration of Discipline reading. The first is from page four where Foster states,
Foster goes on to discuss how we humans try to overcome sin through our own willpower and determination. That thinking leads to certain failure.
I look back over the things I’ve struggled with the last few years, and even with Biblical counseling, I’m still trying to save myself in some ways. I’m still trying to work my way into God's good graces or earn my salvation all myself. Which defeats the purpose of God's GIFT of salvation and the GRACE and MERCY He FREELY gives us. I don't do the work--Jesus does. All he asks is to believe in Him, confess the disobedience to Him and accept the gift He longs to give.
There’s a great song by 1000 generations called Help Me Let Myself Be Loved (© 1000 generations). It's on the To Those Who Cry CD. The lines that came into my head were:
The point is I haven’t gotten it through my head that I am valuable intrinsically. Imageo Deo. I am made in God's image and I am a child of God.
Even with my friends, I wonder if it’s often about what I can do to serve them that gives me validation as to who I am. I’m not sure if it’s selfless service or selfish ambition. That kind of scares me. To know that I may not have realized my true motives behind my actions is unnerving.
Not that my life is lie by any means. I think I honestly like helping people, whether they’re my friends or not. I don’t think all my service comes from an attitude of pride and selfishness. But looking forward I’m going to have to more carefully consider my ‘yes’ and my “no” when it comes to requests. I want to be sure that what I’m doing is for God’s glory, not mine. I want the spotlight to be on him, not me.
Tune in tomorrow for the second revelation from my study time with God. And the talk I had to have with myself was not fun.
A couple things popped out of my Celebration of Discipline reading. The first is from page four where Foster states,
Foster goes on to discuss how we humans try to overcome sin through our own willpower and determination. That thinking leads to certain failure.
Sin is part of the internal structure of our lives. No special effort is needed to produce it.On page five Foster quotes Heini Arnold who says,
As long as we think we can save ourselves by our own willpower, we will only make the evil in us stronger than ever.WOW! Like, helllllooooo Mikki! Talk about slapping me in the face with words. Ouch. The idea that my willpower doesn’t has any defensive position against an unguarded moment had actually not occurred to me in a long time.
I look back over the things I’ve struggled with the last few years, and even with Biblical counseling, I’m still trying to save myself in some ways. I’m still trying to work my way into God's good graces or earn my salvation all myself. Which defeats the purpose of God's GIFT of salvation and the GRACE and MERCY He FREELY gives us. I don't do the work--Jesus does. All he asks is to believe in Him, confess the disobedience to Him and accept the gift He longs to give.
There’s a great song by 1000 generations called Help Me Let Myself Be Loved (© 1000 generations). It's on the To Those Who Cry CD. The lines that came into my head were:
All I want is wanting more of me andFind the full song lyrics here at their website, http://1000generations.com/music/lyrics/to-those-who-cry/help-me-let-me-let-myself-be-loved/ And check out their music while you’re there—they are an amazing group of musicians with real fire for God.The lyrics ring so true. I can’t seem to get over the idea of proving myself to get love. Proving my value in what I do and ignoring the value of who I am. Why is that? Is it because of society? Is it because I’m from a broken home? Is it because I’m a woman? Whatever the underlying cause may be, and I’m sure it’s a combo.
All I make is making it so tough
When it’s easier to prove my worth than take You at Your Word
Help me let me let myself be loved.
The point is I haven’t gotten it through my head that I am valuable intrinsically. Imageo Deo. I am made in God's image and I am a child of God.
Even with my friends, I wonder if it’s often about what I can do to serve them that gives me validation as to who I am. I’m not sure if it’s selfless service or selfish ambition. That kind of scares me. To know that I may not have realized my true motives behind my actions is unnerving.
Not that my life is lie by any means. I think I honestly like helping people, whether they’re my friends or not. I don’t think all my service comes from an attitude of pride and selfishness. But looking forward I’m going to have to more carefully consider my ‘yes’ and my “no” when it comes to requests. I want to be sure that what I’m doing is for God’s glory, not mine. I want the spotlight to be on him, not me.
Tune in tomorrow for the second revelation from my study time with God. And the talk I had to have with myself was not fun.
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